Inspiration

I'm not sure where I found this but it's very inspiring when I see it. 

I hope it will help others too.

Time is ticking away...

I really hate time.

The whole concept of time just really blows big massive giant gargantuan chunks.

The older I get the faster time flies by, and I use to think that was bull crap when my mom would say that to me, but it's really flippin true!!!

I remember when I was in my single digit age,... and it seemed like a minute lasted an hour. Then I hit double digits I couldn't wait to be 16, mom says "don't wish your life away, enjoy it now, 'cuz someday you'll miss these days."  Then twenties,... "I cant wait to be 21!...whoa! 25 slow down!" Unfortunately in my maturity, I've learned that most everything 'my mom said to me', was and is true.

Now, staring into my late 30's, perceiving time as the most precious commodity in the world, and it appears to be accelerating as it is progressing, the most important people in my life have become paramount. Well they should be, and need to be. In this day and progressive technology age, there just is no excuses for not being able to keep up with your loved ones. I start feeling so guilty thinking about how much of my time I spend on myself, and forgetting to contact the people i hold so dear.

The weeks are now comparable to days and the months start to blur, I turn around and 6 have gone by. Time starts speeding up and that same minute that was lasting an hour is now flying by the second now. The weeks are passing like days, once you are into your 'grown up' routine, things start to blend together.

I guess what I'm trying to say is enjoy ever minute,...no, i mean ever second you have on this earth with all the family, friends, and "four legged fur kids", as a bestie of mine would say, be generous with your time and spend it on the important ones!

In the beginning...

I grew up in a very small community. I went to public school, and wasn't very well received by my classmates early on. I remember having many stomach aches, "growing pains", kidney infections, colds and when my female "friend" came, that started a whole new set of painful issues that seemed to be way more annoying and painful for me than for my classmates.

I remember I use to get these terrible back aches that would start in my lower back and then go all the way around to my lower abdominal region, like 'all the way around cramps'. It was like my body was being pulled apart and cut in half. I would literally be in bed for the whole day and exhausted from so much pain. Along with this terrible discomfort would come a terrible debilitating migraine, that may or may not go away for many days.

About the age of 15, and not sexual active or even thinking about such a thing, my doctor suggested I get on "the pill" to help manage my symptoms from monthly cycles. I still had pretty terrible symptoms, at least now I could plan around them every 28 days, lucky me!

I switched schools about my sophomore year, because of social anxiety, and irreconcilable differences with a few tormenters It was much easier to avoid any confrontations than to actually stand up and confront my inability to control my emotions. Every overwhelming emotional outburst seemed to end in uncontrollable crying and sobbing, which if you can imagine was easy for bullies to poke at, and that would just make it worse and so on.
Back then, in the early 90's it wasn't cool, yet, to save kids from harassment, and there was no school of choice, you were all on your own to fend for yourself. I had to see a psychiatrist that ordered the school district to release me to another, due to emotional and mental trauma.

Since then, looking back, I'm very glad for that psychiatrist, Dr. Thompson. I was well accepted in a new environment that didn't already know how or when to push my buttons. Still struggling with my previous issues though, but now at least I had a clean slate. I think even back then I had a lot of the symptoms of fibromyalgia, they just all hadn't become completely overwhelming yet.